You cannot serve from an empty cup…
These words ring true every time I say them to a client who looks exhausted and run down… and I see this more often then I feel is healthy! Are you a working mother, say no more! You need to pay attention and listen up! When was the last time you had some me-time? Don’t remember? Or you don’t even know what it means? Then you are in the danger zone of a weak immune system, feeling constantly overwhelmed by life or you are a workaholic.
Somewhere along the lines we have picked up the false belief that to place ourselves last on the priority list is a noble thing… add to that the idea that doing nothing equals laziness or tardiness, this couldn’t be further from the truth! Even God took the 7th day off to rest! What makes you super-woman or super-man that you believe you can keep going 24/7, 365 days of the year? The idea is to create a life you don’t necessarily need to take a holiday to recover from, but to maintain your energy and equilibrium throughout the year. Who wants to live for the weekend only to exist through the week anyway?
Much of what is driving us in our hectic schedules is fear. Fear of judgement, fear of failure and fear of not having enough. We play the “what if” game all too well! But our bodies tell us when it has simply had enough when our immune system crashes and we are forced to retreat to bed with a whole pharmacy next to our beds to recover as soon as humanly possible… only to get back up on the horse and catch up with the backlog as well as the normal demands on our time. This is life right? Wrong! This is a lifestyle of choice!
Emotionally and mentally this stress can manifest in various ways… poor sleeping patterns, depression, mood swings, poor appetite, constant agitation, frustration and road rage are but a few warning signs that you are already in the danger zone. Self medication with sleeping tablets, pain medication, recreational drugs or alcohol is becoming more common practice, and socially acceptable than ever before. And let’s face it.. stress is the killer if our times. Not to mention poor diet and our relationship with food… that’s a whole other blog…
So, if any of what I’ve written here so far resonates with you, then read on, because I am suggesting a very do-able and affordable manner of maintaining personal equilibrium, by learning and practicing the art of ‘No-Doing’.
Taking a personal day can begin by taking your diary and scheduling a personal day in advance, long before you need to take one by pretending you are sick simply to get the space and time off from work... I know we all do it from time to time when life gets to rough at times! But if this is what you need to do to maintain your sanity, do so, because work will still be there tomorrow, and your wellbeing is far more important! Anyhow, after scheduling your me-time into your diary (you need at least one such day per month!) you need to communicate this intention to your family or to anyone that needs to know that you intend to spend some time alone. Setting this personal boundaries will ensure you are uninterrupted, and will also ensure that your “me time” is guilt free and fully enjoyable.
So where to begin? There are many things you can do to partake in a personal day… you can go shopping alone, or go to the art museum, take your camera and go for a walk in nature, or go for a drive. What ever gets you excited about spending some time alone. But my personal favourite is to do a “pyjama day” at home. Especially now during the winter months. Hibernate a bit… its good for the soul.
But what do you do with yourself all alone at home? Won’t you get bored? The art of doing nothing begins with setting a clear intention. So you need to set some rules in place to ensure you make full use of these rare opportunities that you are creating for yourself. Planning is key! So for a successful pyjama day, you need to make sure you won’t need to leave the house. Stock up on necessary groceries and get a DVD or that novel you’ve been dying to read. Switch off your phone, and engage your “out if the office” feature on your computer. If you are sharing your home with others, hang a “Do not disturb” sign on your door!
Remove your watch, you don’t need to be reminded of time. And every time your nagging voice tells you that you are wasting time, remind that voice that you are engaging in a very purposeful act of self care! Its not a waist of time, in fact its making full use of time! As long as its meaningful by setting intention and using the time to rest or spend it in doing something self affirming, it is a gift of great value to yourself, believe me!
The intention is to try and make this a healthy and uplifting experience, but you know what resonate with your soul… try to avoid having too much sugar and caffeine, and definitely no alcohol or drugs, that would defeats the whole purpose. The idea is to commune with your self, not to escape from yourself! Here us a short list of things you might want to explore and do. Try them all, and keep the ones that work for you… really, do anything that you find relaxing as long as its not a chore, or any work. Avoid all social media, in fact try not to engage with any technology for the day…
Read a book
Prepare yourself a nourishing meal
Meditate
Attend a retreat virtual or actual
Have a salt bath or aromatherapy bath or both!
Give yourself a facial
Light some candles
Burn incense
Have a cup of tea or have the whole pot!
Drink plenty of water
Take a nap
Switch off your phone
Write a letter to yourself
Create positive affirmations
Journal
Take a walk in the park or in nature
Doodle
Colour in an adult colouring book
Paint a painting or create a craft, and if you’re clueless contact me for a personal Creatively fit one on one coaching session!
Listen to music (look at my playlist at the end of my personal favourite list)
Watch a good movie or watch some uplifting TED Talks!
Play with your pets
Do your own manicure/pedicure
Garden or plant something
Let go… and simply BE!
Some of my own personal things I like to use in a personal day of my own are:
Himalayan skin care products for your facial… ( they are affordable and vegan. No preservatives or parabens and very effective and easy to use. You can find them at Clicks or the Wellness warehouse)
Davines hair care to pamper your tresses...(affordable high quality natural and organic haircare products that is sustainable and sulphate and paraben free. It is registered on the slow food Presido that ensures a future for endangered plant species! *Get two products and receive a gift while stocks last!)
Himalayan pink rock salt and aromatherapy oils for a bath (I enjoy Lavender, Patchuli, Sandalwood and Ylang-ylang )
Reiki and meditation (I am a Reiki Master, if ever you can learn this gentle art of healing I encourage you to invest the time and money to do so! Very empowering! )
Smudging (using sacred smoke of burning herbs to cleanse the aura, or simply burning incense is an uplifting experience for me)
Crystals (crystals have a subtle energy that can help to support intention and balance your personal energy field)
Angel and unicorn oracle cards (divination is always a healing and uplifting experience for me. Try a deck that resonates with you!)
My Google music Playlist (music is key to relax and let go!)
https://play.google.com/music/playlist/AMaBXylLAG4cbGjpaRs9H9H2yW9uNTtGCqNt6fBi5vmwhOrc8Soww9UjLcw0guawrOTDQf2d_0P-HrC4oeTnCL0JEG3TjVjuQw%3D%3D
If you can't have a personal day at your own home because you simply don’t have the privacy or time to be alone, then you have to make another plan to incorporate self-care into your routine. If you simply avoid spending time alone, ask yourself why? Why do you find it so frightening to be alone with yourself? What is it that you are avoiding? What is it that you are ignoring? So much treasure is hidden within solidary moments. We centre ourselves, we get in tune with our deepest desires, and we also get to be brutally honest with ourselves.
But above all, we get to fill the cup so we can serve others again because it is full!
But taking the step to self care by using other means like a spa day or visiting me at my fabulous hair salon in Wonderboom (Salon Allure), will go a long way in creating this practice of no-doing in a safe environment where asking these deep questions can be less threatening to your ego self.
Don’t have enough money? Just another reason why visiting Salon Allure might give you a pleasant surprise! The resident beautician is both a joy and a pleasure and her treatments are efficient and deeply pampering, and your wallet will also thank you! Trust me I know this from personal experience. Elmien is super professional and does her work with passion and love. To book a beauty treatment with her, simply give her a call on: 0842341779 I personally recommend her!
Http://www.salon-allure.co.za
I offer money saver deals through the week that makes hair maintenance a breeze… look at these offers…
Money saver deal #1: Root colour, Cut & Blow-dry for only *R699!
Money saver deal #2: Half head HL, Cut & Blow-dry for only *R799!
*This includes a free treatment worth R380! Terms and conditions apply!
Or if this is still too expensive for you, why not let me know what budget you do have to work with? I am sure we can make a plan… there are many ways to go about this. We can do 10x foils to sort out your parting if you are a Hi-Light client (cost about R250), or we can simply tint your hairline and parting to cover the grey hair in-between other maintenance visits (R140 per 10ml of colour)… there are many solutions if you simply communicate with me!
Did you know that I offer small intimate monthly retreats? Yes! Once a month on a Saturday, I present an afternoon retreat where I explore various spiritual topics from a Reiki Masters point of view. Back to basics is intended to empower any individual with the basics of meditation, and insight into topics that is considered basic ideas and truth to be embraced in any spiritual path, no matter what your Religious preference. Part of the afternoon is a meditation session, and an art therapy or craft session where I introduce a simple craft that in some way support the topic of the day or learning to create something beautiful that you can take home with you. We also bring food to share in our social setting, and its always lovely to make new friends!
If you would like to attend one of my future Retreats, simply write to me and I will provide you with dates and the planned topics, so you can book your seat in advance. Limited space available! Cost: R400 per person.
If you read my previous news letter, you would also know that I am busy undergoing training to become a creatively fit life coach! This exciting new method of life coaching from the States is landing on our shores and my husband and I will be the first in the country to present this method of coaching, and also training in this method too! So if this tickles your curiosity, watch this space for more info… I am sincerely looking forward to hearing from you soon to schedule your next pamper session! You are worth it!
Stay blessed and don’t feel so guilty the next time you practice the art of doing nothing! Remember to keep your cup full! Your husband, family and people in your life will thank you for it! Trust me! 😉
Gideonslight.
(see banner on top of this blog for my contact details. I work by appointment only! Feel free to use whatsapp to schedule your appointment! )
